Americas Best What?
Use these links to access all the jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap Blakk Frogg has posted on this site over the years.... ENJOY!
Use these links to access (much) older pages from this site... if you're some kinda' retarded archeologist. Loser. ;)
Blakk Frogg Wear?
You may find yourself curious as to WHY Blakk Frogg would DO such a thing as create an edition of Americas Best dedicated to sex. The answer, folks, lies in the fact that he probably hasn't GOTTEN any in a while and he will live vicariously through the sex jokes and sexy (but safe for myspace) photos.
Sad? Yes. Pathetic? Quite. Oh well. Blakk Frogg says he'll get over it. :P
Most Popular Girls for MySpace for September 2007...
Chance Encounter 'Tween Man and Woman in a Hotel...
A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast.
They are both quite startled.
The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221."
She Has a Gynecologist Appointment Tomorrow...
One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife's arm.
The wife turns over and says "I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh."
The husband, rejected, turns over.
A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow, too?"
Bill Wants to Put His Penis in the Pickle Slicer...
Bill worked in a pickle factory.
He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion.
He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer.
His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill said he would be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own.
One day a few weeks later, Bill came home and his wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. "What's wrong, Bill?" she asked.
"Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?"
"Oh, Bill, you didn't" she exclaimed.
"Yes, I did." he replied.
"My God, Bill, what happened?"
"I got fired."
"No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?"
"Oh... She got fired too."
Married Couple Sitting at Breakfast Table After 50 Years...
A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the wife says, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together."
"I know," the old man said. "We were probably sitting here naked as a jaybird fifty years ago."
"Well," Granny snickered. "Let's relive some old times."
Where upon, the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.
"You know, honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied, "My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago."
"I wouldn't be surprised," replied Gramps. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal."
Many Women Have Formed a New Opinion on Marriage...
When it comes to marriage, a lot of men ask, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
Well, women have caught up, it seems, and they have come up with a slogan of their own to use because according to a recent survey, around 80% of single women prefer to be single....
Curious as to why they feel that way?
Because women realize it's not worth buying the entire pig... just to get a little sausage.
- thanks for reading Volume 99 -