Americas Best What?
Use these links to access all the jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap Blakk Frogg has posted on this site over the years.... ENJOY!
Use these links to access (much) older pages from this site... if you're some kinda' retarded archeologist. Loser. ;)
Blakk Frogg Wear?
real Americans always have their flags handy, ya' know!
Please join us in this FLY THE FLAG campaign and PLEASE forward this message immediately to every warm-blooded American Citizen you can think of. We have three weeks to get the word out all across this great land and into every community in the United States of America.
THE PROGRAM IS THIS:
On Tuesday, September 11th, 2007, an American flag should be displayed outside every home, apartment, office, and store in the United States. Every individual should make it their duty to display an American flag on this anniversary of our country's worst tragedy. We do this in honor of those who lost their lives on 9/11, their families, friends and loved ones who continue to endure the pain, and those who today are fighting at home and abroad to preserve our cherished freedoms.
In the days, weeks and months following 9/11, our country was bathed in American flags as citizens mourned the incredible losses and stood shoulder-to-shoulder against terrorism. Sadly, those flags have all but disappeared. Our patriotism pulled us through some tough times and it shouldn't take another attack to galvanize us in solidarity. Our American flag is the fabric of our country and together we can prevail over terrorism of all kinds.
Action Plan: So, here's what we need you to do...
(1) Forward this message to everyone you know (at least 11 people). Take a moment to think back to how you felt on 9/11 and let those sentiments guide you.
(2) Fly an American flag of any size on 9/11. Honestly, Americans should fly the flag year-round, but if you don't, then at least make it a priority on this day.
Thank you for your participation.
The Best Cheap Date Suggestions?
For all of you that find yourselves broke as hell with the desire to get your groove on, all of us here at Americas Best came up with the perfect Cheap Date package. Simply find a willing partner and break out the following....
(2) Tall Boys of Malt Liquor Beverage to start the party
How will you know when you've found the perfect partenr for the night's events? Easy! Look around the room for anyone wearing a shirt like this:
For those who want a shirt like that so that everyone knows, well, all you have to do is.... click this damn link!
P.S. ------> If you STILL can't get a fun-filled cheap date even with our advice, it's probably because your breath smells like stale, moldy, shredded onions dipped in curdled milk. :P
An Amazing Elephant Story?
In 1986, Mike Mason was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mason approached it very carefully.
He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.
As carefully and as gently as he could, Mason worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.
The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments.
Mason stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.
Mason never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.
Twenty years later, Mason was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son.
As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mason and his son were standing.
The large bull elephant stared at Mason, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.
Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mason couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant.
Mason summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mason's legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.
Probably wasn't the same elephant.
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- blakk frogg
- thanks for reading Volume 97 -