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Americas Best What?
Use these links to access all the jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap Blakk Frogg has posted on this site over the years.... ENJOY!
Use these links to access (much) older pages from this site... if you're some kinda' retarded archeologist. Loser. ;)
Blakk Frogg Wear?
Blakk Frogg advances his sarcasm by digging deep in his beer-soaked brain for cool ideas so that you can tell the world to put a cock in it!
blakk frogg is sarcastic for life
Blakk Frogg heard you scream, "tie me up tight & wear me out" before you had to pick your speed 'cuz you were ready to screw a texas tart at the end of a cheap date... Hopefully ya' did-r-good!
Check out the cool gear
at the Blakk Frogg Store
About This Letter: Out of the blue this morning a female co-worker asked me to write a 'fuck off and die letter' to a guy in jail who had secretly been talking to his ex-wife, and telling her how he thought often of sex with her, putting his tongue in.... shitty places, etc. Sorry, Charlie, but from what I've seen, women 'On the Outside' can and WILL talk to one another.
So, without further ado, here's what I wrote for my co-worker bright and early this morning:
In the hot Summer sun, I bask in it's light... thinking and knowing that they've done something right.Locking you up, and taking you away, thank God for Justice 'cuz now you will pay.
Cellmates and lockdowns, jail rapes and shakedowns... I bet you look sexy in the infirmary gowns.
Life on the outside, so wild and free; oh how I bet you wish you were me.
Heard your new best friends are treating you well, as you're jacking off in that 6 by 6 Hell.
Spank it, smack it, stroke it and groan, but never-the-less you're still quite alone -- except for Steve, Tony and Tom, of course... I hope they make you one of their whores.
I trusted you and your words, now I hope men are impacting your turds.
So think of me and all the others, as you dodge prison shanks from nazis, skinheads, gringos and brothers.
Think of me often, and think of me well, 'cuz you'll never have me again, not wearing that inmate smell.
You lied and you cheated, my heart you defeated; thanks for the memories, I hope your new boyfriend gives you Herpes.
Never again will touch my soft skin or feel my warm heart. From now on all you'll get is your cellmates rank fart.
Your ex wife told me of your begging for sex: anal, oral, coitus and more. God.... You'll make such a cute prison whore.
I hope you rot, and from a guard get shot..... or at the very least suffer and bleed for each wrong action and deed.
And now I will go, dear Correctional Hoe, and find a real man, a real life.... and leave you to become some fat biker's wife.
Love,
NOT ANYMORE
P.S. ----> The fact that you like sticking things in asses makes total sense 'cusz it seems like that's where your head has been for quite some time. So long; Farewell; Fuck off.... GOODBYE.
Now that I've offended some people and left scars on the minds of a few others, I can begin my day with a smile. Hope everyone has a great week and reaches the weekend in a hurry!
- blakk frogg
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Thought My Day Would Turn Out Just Fine?
I woke up this morning thinking that since I had made it through 4/5 of the week without getting the shit kicked out of me at work, and that no one had drafted me into helping them move this coming weekend, that I would have a pleasant end to the week.
Then I stepped outside and saw this:
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Wife Always Getting Pregnant on Vacation?
Billy Bob and Luther were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob tells Luther, "Ya know, I reckon I'm 'bout ready for a vacation. Only this year I'm gonna do it a little different!"
"The last few years, I took your advice about where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Earline got pregnant."
"Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Earline got pregnant again. Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Earline didn't get pregnant again."
Luther asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that's different?"
Billy Bob says, "This year I'm taking Earline with me."
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More Places to Find Free MySpace Comment Pics?
Looking for other sources of wacky, sexy, crazy, funky, sarcastic and/or sadistically twisted MySpace Comments? Look no further! Use these to find what you're looking for!
Other Stuff? Like What?
Show your love and support of Blakk Frogg's web ventures by checking out the unusual stuff for your body at Da' Frogg Store and for those who just love to laugh, well, you need to check out Da' Blakk Frogg Joke Blog!
Wanna' Support Da' Frogg's Drinking Habit?
If you like this or any of his other sites, have a heart and send him a few pennies if you can. Why? Because the more beer money he has, the more web work he'll do!
Blakk Frogg has no shame in asking for handouts. Spare change, hundred dollar bills, whatever. It all spends the same to him during Happy Hour, bitches! C'ya!
- blakk frogg