Check out the cool gear
at the Blakk Frogg Store
Americas Best What?
Use these links to access all the jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap Blakk Frogg has posted on this site over the years.... ENJOY!
Use these links to access (much) older pages from this site... if you're some kinda' retarded archeologist. Loser. ;)
Blakk Frogg Wear?
Blakk Frogg advances his sarcasm by digging deep in his beer-soaked brain for cool ideas so that you can tell the world to put a cock in it!
blakk frogg is sarcastic for life
Blakk Frogg heard you scream, "tie me up tight & wear me out" before you had to pick your speed 'cuz you were ready to screw a texas tart at the end of a cheap date... Hopefully ya' did-r-good!
Check out the cool gear
at the Blakk Frogg Store
What can I wear?
Blakk Frogg suggests you stop buying brand names because your friends have them. Buy Blakk Frogg Designs instead and make THEM follow YOUR lead.
Why? Because you'll be the coolest thing since I poured liquid nitrogen down the back of your shorts!
LITTLE TONY ON MATH
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little TONY.
He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."
Then little TONY says, "I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
To which Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on," but I like your thinking."
LITTLE TONY ON MATH (Part 2)
Little TONY returns from school and says he got an 'F' in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father?
"The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3,'" I said "6", replies TONY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me "How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the fucking difference?" asks the father.
"That's what I said!"
LITTLE TONY ON ENGLISH
Little TONY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
TONY says "Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little TONY, that's a mouthful."
Little TONY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
how to keep latter day saints away
never piss off a New York woman
getting back at your neighbors
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR
Little TONY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"
The teacher replied, 'Now, TONY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'
Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."
Little TONY, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"
how to use rakes in the off-season
LITTLE TONY ON GRAMMAR (Part 2)
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First, she called! on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
She said, "Excellent, Michael!" Then the teacher reluctantly called on little TONY.
"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!'"
blakk frogg's friends would aim for the fish!
LITTLE TONY ON GETTING OLDER
Little TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little TONY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his own damn business."
got an itch? she lives in Utah. look her up.
Will Blakk Frogg Bless The Meek With One More Joke Before He Leaves?
A man calls home to his wife and says, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing at Everglades City, a town in Florida, with my boss and several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting so would you please pack me enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and tackle box. We're leaving from the office and I will swing by the house to pick my things up. Oh, AND Please pack my new blue silk pajamas."
The wife thinks this sounds a little fishy, but being a good wife, she dID exactly what her husband asked.
The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good. The wife welcomes him home and asks if he caught many fish?
He says, "Yes! Lot's of Trout, some Red Fish, and a few Snook... But, honey, why didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked?"
The wife replies "Oh, dear but I did pack them. They were in your tackle box."