Check out the cool gear
at the Blakk Frogg Store
Americas Best What?
Use these links to access all the jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap Blakk Frogg has posted on this site over the years.... ENJOY!
Use these links to access (much) older pages from this site... if you're some kinda' retarded archeologist. Loser. ;)
Blakk Frogg Wear?
Blakk Frogg advances his sarcasm by digging deep in his beer-soaked brain for cool ideas so that you can tell the world to put a cock in it!
blakk frogg is sarcastic for life
Blakk Frogg heard you scream, "tie me up tight & wear me out" before you had to pick your speed 'cuz you were ready to screw a texas tart at the end of a cheap date... Hopefully ya' did-r-good!
Check out the cool gear
at the Blakk Frogg Store
Not enough people realize the dangers posed by frogs. For years people have stuffed firecrackers in their mouthes, used them as bait, and sliced them apart in biology classes.
Too bad they never accidentally picked up these little fellows with their bare hands: Poison Arrow Dart Frogs.
The toxins secreted from the backs of these animals can kill a man and Blakk Frogg thinks death might leave a lasting impression on those cruel bastards. Leave my cousins alone, you heartless pricks!
Did Blakk Frogg's distant family get a little larger?
According to an article published on Yahoo (read the full article), scientists in Venezuela recently discovered a cavern (Cueva del Fantasma) created by a collapsed gorge large enough to safely allow two helicopters to land simultaneously.
Inside the cave they identified a number of new species including this awesome looking critter now known as Colostethus breweri.
OK, time for Blakk Frogg to speak. Love the frog. Definitely a gorgeous (and deadly!) species worth admiring... but how the hell did a topographical feature of that magnitude go undiscovered for all this time? I mean, look at that thing! No one saw it from the air before now?
We can do all sorts of nifty things with radar, zoom in on a satellite image of a housing development and overlay roadmaps using Google's new free mapping tool but we didn't know about this gaping hole in the Earth? Hmmm.... Seems highly improbable and Blakk Frogg thinks somebody's full of shit.
Wildly cool designs from the mind of Blakk Frogg?
 more blakk frogg "loves to nail" items |
 more blakk frogg "pick your speed" items |
 more blakk frogg "ready to screw" items |
To download any of the above images for your phone, right-click the image, save to your hard drive, then take yo' ass to mob storage so you can upload it to your phone for f-r-e-e.
So ya' wanna' wear one of these designs, do ya'? Then hop yo' nasty ass over to blakk frogg's cafepress site and check out all the Blakk Frogg Original designs on golf shirts, t-shirts, camisoles, tank tops, sweatshirts, coffee mugs, beer steins, and... thongs & boxers!
General Lee's rebel army rides into battle again?
The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the U. S. REDNECK SPECIAL FORCES (USRSF).
These 500 Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Louisiana, Missouri, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas, Tennessee and North & South Carolina boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given only the following five facts about terrorists:
- The season opened today.
- There is no limit.
- They taste just like chicken.
- They don't like beer, pickups, country music, or Jesus.
- They are responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.
The mess in Iraq is expected to be over in about a week.
- from a certified redneck email!
Taking time out for cold beer & warm boobs makes sense?
Everyone knows Blakk Frogg likes beer. He prefers the microbrews and specitalty beers but sometimes, when he feels he need to re-live his younger days, he buys a few cases of the beer (swill) he chugged as a tadpole, er, student.
Nasty, cheap, never filtered, served in dirty mugs, and tastes like backwash from the first sip straight through to the last. Mmmm, Mmmm, Refreshing.
Blakk Frogg thanks his lucky stars that he has a job. Otherwise he'd have to drink that horse piss all the time!
For the record, Blakk Frogg is not referring to St. Pauli Girl. Seeing her cans, er, beer mugs, caused me to think about the various beers he has consumed over the years. He likes St. Pauli Girl every once in a while. Yummy stuff. He really likes her cans, too. Really. He does.