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Americas Best What? Use these links to access all the jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap Blakk Frogg has posted on this site over the years.... ENJOY!
Use these links to access (much) older pages from this site... if you're some kinda' retarded archeologist. Loser. ;)
Blakk Frogg Wear? Blakk Frogg advances his sarcasm by digging deep in his beer-soaked brain for cool ideas so that you can tell the world to put a cock in it!
Blakk Frogg heard you scream, "tie me up tight & wear me out" before you had to pick your speed 'cuz you were ready to screw a texas tart at the end of a cheap date... Hopefully ya' did-r-good!
Check out the cool gear
Show me your Frogg? Blakk Frogg keeps designing new shit to make you look better! Not that you're ugly or anything, but in Frogg Gear you look soooooo much sexier!
Spammers make you sick? Just plain wrong: "Spammers peddle bogus Tamiflu bird flu drug" OK, so we all have to make money in order to live in this world. Fine. But people selling artificial vaccines against deadly viruses to make a buck makes me sick to my stomach -- and could possibly kill someone! Blakk Frogg says this to all the politicians posing for the cameras and declaring war on pornography: "Pull your fucking heads out of your asses and arrest people who are KILLING people, not making it easier for folks to masturbate. Sexually oriented magazines, websites, videos and toys (usually) don't kill anyone. Fake medicinces usually DO. Get it?"
Peyote not a brain killer? Yep. Scientists have studied the effects of peyote and determined that they cannot find evidence that use of peyote rots your brain in any way. Alcohol, marijuana and LSD, on the other hand, hurt you for the rest of your life it seems. Blakk Frogg has never done peyote. He has, however, lost the ability two right properlee dew to hevvy yuse uvv thee othur thingz. source article: read it here
Yoga does little good? According to this article, people who attend yoga classes hoping to lose weight need their heads examined. Blakk Frogg already knew that serious stretching, bending and breathing exercises only help you lose weight if you do them while engaged in some hardore sexual activity. Also, Blakk Frogg believes nothing says "I love you" quite as well as tying your partner in a knot and banging the shit out of them. |
What has Blakk Frogg made for me to wear this time? cheap dates and hourly rates make the world a much better place!
Done with the sleazy sex topic yet? Blakk Frogg thinks you should also proudly display your love of cheap, low-down, tawdry sexual adventures on your home and/or office computer. Let your friends and loved ones know how you feel and they will admire you for your honesty.
Got any jokes about a Texas preacher and the KKK? The Texas preacher rose with an angry red face, saying, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family." No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit that this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel wonderful. Now please stand and confess your transgression." Again, all was quiet. Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde, with a body that would stop traffic, rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke. "Reverend, there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets!" The preacher fainted. - straight outta' email!
Blakk Frogg finally got himself another 4-wheel vehicle? Although the feeling of riding a bmw motorcycle ranks damn near euphoria, wet roads and cold temperatures make even the most die-hard motorcycle enthusiasts yearn for a roof over their heads on their way to the supermarket, work, or house of ill repute.
Confusion over anatomy on the golf course? A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf layout became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, "I'm on the 7th hole, and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole." He thanked her and went back to his golf. On the back nine the same thing happened; and he approached her again with the same request. She said, "I'm on the 14th hole, you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th hole." Once again he thanked her and returned to his play. He finished his round and went to the clubhouse where he saw the same lady sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady. The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often. He approached her and said, "Let me buy you a drink in appreciation for your help. I understand that you are in the sales profession. I'm in sales, also. What do you sell?" She replied, "If I tell you, you'll laugh." "No, I won't." "Well, if you must know," she answered, "I work for Tampax." With that, he laughed so hard he almost lost his breath. She said, "See I knew you would laugh." "That's not what I'm laughing at," he replied. "I'm a salesman for Preparation H, so I'm still a hole behind you!" - bad joke came from a bad email! |
- thanks for reading Volume 39 -